Very Funny Corvette Jokes
Aug 9th, 2008 by ZR1Vette
Great Corvette Jokes
Anyone That Lives In Florida Will Appreciate This Joke!
A fellow bought a new 2003 Anniversary model and was out on I-75 for a nice evening drive.
The top was down, the breeze was blowing through his hair and just out side of “Land O’ Lakes” he decided to open her up. As the needle jumped up to 90 mph he suddenly saw a flashing red and blue light behind him.
“There ain’t no way they can catch a Corvette,” he thought to himself and opened her up further. The needle hit 100, 110, 120 and finally 130 with the lights still behind him. “What in hell am I doing?” he thought suddenly and pulled over.
The cop came up to him, took his license without a word and examined it and the car.
“I’ve had a tough shift and this is my last pull over. I don’t feel like more paperwork so if you can give me an excuse for your driving that I haven’t heard before you can go!”
“Last week my wife ran off with a cop,” the man said, “and I was afraid you were trying to give her back!”
“Have a nice night”, said the officer.
Watch Where You Are Going In Your Z06
A man goes out and buys a 2003 model. One night he takes it out for a spin, and stops at a red light. An old man pulls up next to him riding a mopped. The old man looks over the Vette and says, “What kind of car ya got there sonny?” The man replies, “It’s a Z06, the best sports car in the USA; it cost me over $60,000.”
“That’s a lot of money” says the old man. Why do they cost so much?” The man answers, “Because they can go 190 miles an hour!” The old man pokes his head in the window and looks around. Leaning back on his mopped, the old man says, “That’s a pretty nice car all right!”
Just then the light changes, so the guy decides to show the old man what the car can do. He floors it, and in a few seconds the speedo reads 120 MPH. Suddenly he notices a dot in his rear view mirror that seems to be catching up to him. Afraid it might be a cop, he slows down to 65 and suddenly whhhoooosshh! Something whips by him going much faster!
“What on earth could be going faster than this Vette?” the man asks himself. Then, ahead of him, he sees a dot coming towards him. Whhoooosshh! It goes by again, heading the opposite direction! And it sorta looked like the old man on the mopped!
“Couldn’t be,” thinks the guy. “How could a mopped outrun a Vette?”
Then again he sees a dot in his rear view mirror! Whhooosshh – Blam! It plows into the back of the Vette! The man jumps out. It is the old man! Of course, the mopped and the old man are in a world of hurt. The guy runs up to the old man and cries, “You’re hurt bad! Is there anything I can do for you?”
The old man groans and replies, “Yes, could you please unhook my suspenders from your side mirror?”
Vettes and Bikes Flying By
A man decided that he was going to ride a 10-speed bike from Phoenix to Flagstaff. He got as far as Black Canyon City before the mountains became just too much and he could go no further. He stuck his thumb out, but after 3 hours, he hadn’t gotten a single person to stop. Finally, a guy in a Corvette pulled over and offered him a ride. Of course, the bike wouldn’t fit in the car. The corvette owner found a piece of rope lying by the highway and tied it to his bumper. He tied the other end to the bike and told the man that if he was going to fast, to honk the horn on his bike and he would slow down.
Everything went fine for the first 30 miles. Suddenly, another Corvette blew past them. Not to be outdone, the Corvette pulling the bike took off after the other. A short distance down the road, the Corvettes, both going well over 120 mph, blew through a speed trap.
The police officer noted the speed from his radar gun and radio to the other officer that he has two Corvettes headed his way at over 120 mph. HE then relayed, and you’re not going to believe this, but there’s a guy on a 10-speed bike honking to pass!
